So, while we were getting ready for the day, Jim tells me he has a question for me. I never know what kind of question it will be when he says something like this, so I've learned to just roll with it.
Jim: If a witch doctor forces you to choose between two potions to drink, which would you choose? The first one will make you smell horrible to all other people, but you will smell sweet and pleasant to yourself. The second one will make you smell nice to everyone else, but you will smell moderately offensive to yourself.
Me: What happens if I don't choose?
Jim: You'll be killed. Stop trying to attack the problem.
Me: Is this a philosophical problem, or are you trying to tell me I have a body odor issue?
Jim: No, you smell nice. Just answer the question.
Me: I choose not to choose. The first option would be very lonely, because no one would want to be around me. With the second option, I know I can't stand to be smelly, so I probably would just sleep all the time so I wouldn't have to smell myself, which would also be very lonely. So, I'll just let the witch doctor kill me, rather than live a lonely miserable life.
Jim: Interesting. When I developed the problem, I didn't anticipate that being an answer.
Me: You've known me for how long, and you still didn't anticipate my answer? What would you answer?
Jim: Well, when I developed it, I was going to pick option two. It was about what I could still do for other people, and I figured I would get used to my own body odor eventually. The question was supposed to be a way of assessing a person's selfishness.
Me: So, what does my answer tell you then?
Jim: I'm not sure. You managed to input a 2 into the binary code that can only handle 1s and 0s.
Me: Hmm. So my answer does not compute. I'm pretty sure I just destroyed the Daleks and saved the universe. So, I believe that makes me the least selfish person ever. I win!
Jim: [SIGH] There's no winners or losers. Plus, you know the Daleks don't really exist, right?
Me: I know they don't exist...anymore. You're welcome.
Jim: [Shakes his head] I think I need to go lay down.
So, which would you choose? Also, If you don't know what a Dalek is, then you probably don't realize the importance of my choice. I suggest you have a Doctor Who watching marathon and then come back and thank me.